So here it is, April 26th and I'm restarting my change in eating habits I guess. Last month and a half complete and utter hell. Husband is pushing me to start this again. To be perfectly honest though, I don't want to. Don't get me wrong. I want to change my ways, eat healthier, exercise and lose weight. Just not right now. Right now I have so much on my plate that it's really the last thing I seem to be able to focus on. Not to mention the fact I don't think we can really afford it. I'm cooking every meal and the groceries are completely coming out of our pockets right now. Eating healthier costs a lot more.
But I also don't want to disappoint my husband. Aside from a bit of stress I didn't really need in the last few days, he's been really good to me. I just wish I could make him understand I'm not ready yet. I need calm and preparation before I can do this right and I'm just not there yet. I know he means well, trying to motivate me and get me going even though I don't want to. Works better when I've already started though.
Anyway, guess this is day 1 once again.... here goes nothing.
Showing posts with label Miscellaneous. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Miscellaneous. Show all posts
Monday, April 26, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
Quick Update...
So a lot has happened since my last post. First off, my laptop died while I was in Grand Rapids. My husband tried to fix it but it seems that it's just pooched. So instead of buying a new once, as that's the second one I've gone through in like 3 years, we updated our desktop computer instead. I'll be using that for a while, what little I am able to get online.
My dad is out of that horrible hospital and Grand Rapids finally. They just don't seem to care about their jobs or much of anything else in that hospital. He's been transferred to a physical rehabilitation facility in Southfield. It wasn't my first choice as it's an hour drive from our house but it was the only facility near any of the family that would take him.
Not speaking to some of my family right now. My Father's siblings as well as my Uncle's wife can't seem to get it in their heads that they do not have medical degrees and therefore they don't know what medications my father should and should not be on right now. They also can't seem to get it in their heads that any decisions while my father is unable to make them himself will be made by me and my siblings, not them. They also do not believe my father actually went through alcohol withdrawal, another reason they should be left out of his treatment decisions. I am no longer taking their calls as all speaking with them seems to do is raise my already high blood pressure.
The place my dad is in let me bring our dog to see him. I think it was really good for both of them. Have to get her into the vet before she can come back though as they need copies of the papers stating her shots are up to date and she's due for her yearly visit. Was going to get her in when dad got back from his trip, this just isn't how I saw that happening at the time.
My diet was completely blown by my time in Grand Rapids. The stress as well as the lack of my treadmill and the lack of healthy food choices in that horrible hospital did it in. Unfortunately right now I just don't have to time to do everything I was doing either so it's on hold until I get into the swing of things here or my father comes home so I have more time to myself again. I'm disappointed by this as I was doing so well. But all I can do is chalk it up as something that's out of my control. I know I can do it as I was doing it before. I just need to get some of the crap in my life under control so I can focus on it again.
My dad is out of that horrible hospital and Grand Rapids finally. They just don't seem to care about their jobs or much of anything else in that hospital. He's been transferred to a physical rehabilitation facility in Southfield. It wasn't my first choice as it's an hour drive from our house but it was the only facility near any of the family that would take him.
Not speaking to some of my family right now. My Father's siblings as well as my Uncle's wife can't seem to get it in their heads that they do not have medical degrees and therefore they don't know what medications my father should and should not be on right now. They also can't seem to get it in their heads that any decisions while my father is unable to make them himself will be made by me and my siblings, not them. They also do not believe my father actually went through alcohol withdrawal, another reason they should be left out of his treatment decisions. I am no longer taking their calls as all speaking with them seems to do is raise my already high blood pressure.
The place my dad is in let me bring our dog to see him. I think it was really good for both of them. Have to get her into the vet before she can come back though as they need copies of the papers stating her shots are up to date and she's due for her yearly visit. Was going to get her in when dad got back from his trip, this just isn't how I saw that happening at the time.
My diet was completely blown by my time in Grand Rapids. The stress as well as the lack of my treadmill and the lack of healthy food choices in that horrible hospital did it in. Unfortunately right now I just don't have to time to do everything I was doing either so it's on hold until I get into the swing of things here or my father comes home so I have more time to myself again. I'm disappointed by this as I was doing so well. But all I can do is chalk it up as something that's out of my control. I know I can do it as I was doing it before. I just need to get some of the crap in my life under control so I can focus on it again.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Things on hold for a bit...
I know it's been quite some time since I updated. There is good reason for this. Saturday the 13th my husband and I got together with our best friends. That night (around 1 am Sunday morning), I got a phone call from my uncle that my father had a heart attack while visiting him in Big Rapids, Michigan. He was taken to the hospital there and soon transferred to a larger hospital in Grand Rapids. Needless to say, my life has been turned a bit upside down since this event.
After sobering up and getting about 3 hours of sleep, my husband and I made the 2 1/2 hour journey to Grand Rapids. My father had to have a procedure done Monday the 15th to clear a blocked artery and to put a stint in that artery to keep it open. Unfortunately that evening he also went into Alcohol Withdrawals. Yes, my father is an alcoholic. He's also in denial about it. Most people don't know because he is what I call a functioning alcoholic. He goes about his life like he hasn't had a drink at all. He's not abusive. He's not falling down. But yet every day he has 3-4 drinks and they are very strong drinks at that.
Due to the withdrawals he kept getting out of bed even though he wasn't supposed to. He was trying to leave the hospital even though we told him he couldn't. At times he didn't even know who I was and tried to hurt me (yes I know this was the withdrawals and not him, but it is still a sign to me of just how far gone my father was as he would never do such a thing to me under normal circumstances).
After it took almost a dozen people to keep him in his bed, they sedated him. Because of the sedation he also had to be on a breathing machine. It's taken them almost a week to get him off the sedation and breathing machine. In the process of all this he has also developed Pneumonia. So now it's a waiting game. With luck he will be able to leave the hospital at the end of the week, but considering originally he was supposed to leave the hospital a day or two after the stint was put in, I'm not holding my breath.
I'm still keeping up with my change in eating habits as much as hospital food will allow. I've had a couple little slips due to lack of healthy choices or stress. But all in all, I'm doing the best I can. I will start posting regularly again once I'm back home.
After sobering up and getting about 3 hours of sleep, my husband and I made the 2 1/2 hour journey to Grand Rapids. My father had to have a procedure done Monday the 15th to clear a blocked artery and to put a stint in that artery to keep it open. Unfortunately that evening he also went into Alcohol Withdrawals. Yes, my father is an alcoholic. He's also in denial about it. Most people don't know because he is what I call a functioning alcoholic. He goes about his life like he hasn't had a drink at all. He's not abusive. He's not falling down. But yet every day he has 3-4 drinks and they are very strong drinks at that.
Due to the withdrawals he kept getting out of bed even though he wasn't supposed to. He was trying to leave the hospital even though we told him he couldn't. At times he didn't even know who I was and tried to hurt me (yes I know this was the withdrawals and not him, but it is still a sign to me of just how far gone my father was as he would never do such a thing to me under normal circumstances).
After it took almost a dozen people to keep him in his bed, they sedated him. Because of the sedation he also had to be on a breathing machine. It's taken them almost a week to get him off the sedation and breathing machine. In the process of all this he has also developed Pneumonia. So now it's a waiting game. With luck he will be able to leave the hospital at the end of the week, but considering originally he was supposed to leave the hospital a day or two after the stint was put in, I'm not holding my breath.
I'm still keeping up with my change in eating habits as much as hospital food will allow. I've had a couple little slips due to lack of healthy choices or stress. But all in all, I'm doing the best I can. I will start posting regularly again once I'm back home.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
A Mental Update....
So I haven't really posted too much more than my daily updates lately. There is a reason for this. Truth be told, I haven't had much I really wanted to say. But I suppose I should.
For some reason I've been growing more and more agitated in the past week. Granted, it's been happening off and on since this change to my nutritional habits began but I just figured that to be natural. I've come to the conclusion this isn't the case any longer.
My agitation has been growing until I know want nothing more than to scream and yell and break things. I want to tell everyone in my life to go fuck themselves, lock myself in my room and never come out again.
The strange part of this is I don't know why. It's not like anyone is doing anything different than they were a few weeks or few months ago. It's not like I'm due for my monthly. It's not like I'm depriving myself so much that I have a reason to be pissy. I just am.
Now I fully admit it's been a rough couple of weeks. The change in nutritional habits has thrown our finances for a bit of a loop. I had no idea that taking on 2 more cooking days and cooking healthier would add to the grocery bill as much as it did. But things are looking up in that concern so that can't be what's wrong.
Lack of work hasn't helped my disposition much either. But I'm fully aware that I'm not the only one with that problem and I am taking steps to try and fix that issue one way or another. So that shouldn't be it either.
And yes my father is a big issue with my stress levels. But even at his worst, I've never been this irritable simply because the man opened his mouth to speak. He even looks at me right now and I want to rip him a new one. That's not normal.
Perhaps Spring Fever isn't helping? We have gotten warmer weather the last couple days and I'm pretty much home bound until payday. But that can't be the whole answer. I've had Spring Fever before and it's never been like this.
All I want right now is some peace and quiet. No questions from my father, no fox news blaring from the tv, no dog barking and every little thing that moves outside our front window, no cats meowing to get my attention...
I just wish I knew why I was like this right now. I hope it gets better... and soon so I don't go off on someone.
For some reason I've been growing more and more agitated in the past week. Granted, it's been happening off and on since this change to my nutritional habits began but I just figured that to be natural. I've come to the conclusion this isn't the case any longer.
My agitation has been growing until I know want nothing more than to scream and yell and break things. I want to tell everyone in my life to go fuck themselves, lock myself in my room and never come out again.
The strange part of this is I don't know why. It's not like anyone is doing anything different than they were a few weeks or few months ago. It's not like I'm due for my monthly. It's not like I'm depriving myself so much that I have a reason to be pissy. I just am.
Now I fully admit it's been a rough couple of weeks. The change in nutritional habits has thrown our finances for a bit of a loop. I had no idea that taking on 2 more cooking days and cooking healthier would add to the grocery bill as much as it did. But things are looking up in that concern so that can't be what's wrong.
Lack of work hasn't helped my disposition much either. But I'm fully aware that I'm not the only one with that problem and I am taking steps to try and fix that issue one way or another. So that shouldn't be it either.
And yes my father is a big issue with my stress levels. But even at his worst, I've never been this irritable simply because the man opened his mouth to speak. He even looks at me right now and I want to rip him a new one. That's not normal.
Perhaps Spring Fever isn't helping? We have gotten warmer weather the last couple days and I'm pretty much home bound until payday. But that can't be the whole answer. I've had Spring Fever before and it's never been like this.
All I want right now is some peace and quiet. No questions from my father, no fox news blaring from the tv, no dog barking and every little thing that moves outside our front window, no cats meowing to get my attention...
I just wish I knew why I was like this right now. I hope it gets better... and soon so I don't go off on someone.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Nausea Sucks!
So I really got hit with the nausea today. Before anyone suggests it, pregnancy test came back negative (had to verify due to a late period and my IUD putting me at risk of tubal pregnancies). It's just my sinuses draining.
I have to say though. Whatever pregnant woman realized ginger ale and saltines help with nausea is a saint in my eyes. Yes my husband has informed me it was actually sailors that came up with it, but ya know what, I say the credit still goes to a pregnant woman. lol
I have to say though. Whatever pregnant woman realized ginger ale and saltines help with nausea is a saint in my eyes. Yes my husband has informed me it was actually sailors that came up with it, but ya know what, I say the credit still goes to a pregnant woman. lol
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